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Posts tagged ‘beef’

Barbies who will never be confused with Magellan

The other night we were sitting around watching television when Barbie decided to make dinner.  It seems that Barbie had found a neat little Tex-Mex rice dish on-line and she wanted to try making it and see if it was any good.  So we made up some taco seasoned ground beef, rice, and vegetables which were then thrown into a casserole dish topped with nacho chips and cheese.

“Dinner’s ready”, Barbie said.  “Maybe we can watch it with that show we’ve been watching.  What’s it called…Justified.”

“Sure, I’ll turn on Netflix”, I answered.

“Yep, a Tex-Mex meal while we watch Texas marshals”, Barbie said.

I was rather confused by this and let Barbie know that.  “You do realize this show takes place in Kentucky right?”

“What do you mean?  He has cowboy hats and boots.  Plus he has an accent.”

“Everyone south of Cincinnati has a southern accent.  The Carolinas, Georgia, Tennessee, Louisiana…all have southern accents.”

“Well that puts a damper on having a theme dinner doesn’t it”, Barbie stated as she walked back to the kitchen for the food.

This, however, reminded me of an instance when I use to drive up and down the US east coast wrestling.  I was driving down to the Blue Ridge mountain area of North Carolina and I stopped at a rest station in Virginia.  This gas stop was advertised as the last one before the state line.  So I filled up and went it to pay for my gas when I had the following conversation:

“I’m looking at the map here and it looks like the state line is about an hour and a half or possibly two hours away.  Is that about right?”, I asked of the attendant.

With what can be described as ‘deer in headlights’ the lady behind the counter stared at me and with a stereotypical southern drawl responded “Oh, I don’t know.  I don’t get out a lot”

To say I was flabbergasted would be putting it mildly.  “Shouldn’t information like this be part of your training orientation?  Being the last gas station and all?”

I was met with a look that told me I had reached the intellectual capacity of this poor soul and just left my money on the counter and walked away.



Teen Barbies and the Foods They Like

Another great story from a follower who reads the blog in regards to the silliness he’s overheard on his commuter train from Teen Barbies or Barbies-in-Training.

It seems this young ladies, 3 in total, were riding the GO train into Toronto and discussing food options they enjoy.  Based on the story told to me it went something like this:

“I really enjoy certain seafood, like crab and stuff.  And I absolutely love shrimp”, says teen #1.

“No, I’m not a fan of that stuff”, retorts teen #2.  “I’m more a beef girl.”

“Yeah, I don’t really like beef”, replies teen #1.

“Well, growing up my dad and grandad used to go splits on half a cow”, explains teen #2.  “So we wound up with a lot of beef and all the different cuts of beef in our freezer.”

“Oh wow, that would be nice.  The different steaks and hamburgers and stuff”, chipped in teen #3.

At this moment it all went downhill as teen #1 added, “Oh that is cool.  Did you get bacon with that too?”

Teen #2 replies “Yeah I think we did.  I always had bacon in the house so I guess bacon does come with it”

Apparently a few moments passed when all of a sudden one of thos scientific miracles, like the Big Bang, occured on the train and teen #3 had a great moment of clarity (or at least the connection of another synapse) and she piped up “Um, I don’t think bacon comes from a cow…I think bacon comes from pigs”

The three girls dropped the conversation at that point, probably due to the confusion they were all feeling at such a monumental step in intellect.


Barbies in-training…and why I drink

OK, so I get an email from a reader who felt that this deserved a place on the Barbie Fails Blog, and after reading his email I fully agree.

“I was sitting on the GO train tonight heading home and two ladies ( aged somewhere around 16-18 bracket) were trying to play a game where each girl would name a new animal using the last letter of the animal name used ( eg: goat, next person needs to find a T animal).
During the announcements at one station I couldn’t hear what one of the girls says, but the next answer is beef cow. The other girl challenges the answer with get vigor saying that there is no such thing as a beef cow.  At this moment I had a small snicker and felt badly for the, what I thought was, lesser intelligent of the two girls.  That moment of grandeur was short-lived and the intellectual bubble was not just burst but mushroom clouded when she felt the need to add the followingand the REAL answer is steak cow”. They fight about this for the next 5 minutes.
At the end of all this they came to the conclusion and belief that there was a difference between the 2 animals – beef and steak cows……this is why i cry for the future.”

And it is for reasons like this that I drink…in fact I might have one now


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