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Posts tagged ‘dinner’

Barbies who will never be confused with Magellan

The other night we were sitting around watching television when Barbie decided to make dinner.  It seems that Barbie had found a neat little Tex-Mex rice dish on-line and she wanted to try making it and see if it was any good.  So we made up some taco seasoned ground beef, rice, and vegetables which were then thrown into a casserole dish topped with nacho chips and cheese.

“Dinner’s ready”, Barbie said.  “Maybe we can watch it with that show we’ve been watching.  What’s it called…Justified.”

“Sure, I’ll turn on Netflix”, I answered.

“Yep, a Tex-Mex meal while we watch Texas marshals”, Barbie said.

I was rather confused by this and let Barbie know that.  “You do realize this show takes place in Kentucky right?”

“What do you mean?  He has cowboy hats and boots.  Plus he has an accent.”

“Everyone south of Cincinnati has a southern accent.  The Carolinas, Georgia, Tennessee, Louisiana…all have southern accents.”

“Well that puts a damper on having a theme dinner doesn’t it”, Barbie stated as she walked back to the kitchen for the food.

This, however, reminded me of an instance when I use to drive up and down the US east coast wrestling.  I was driving down to the Blue Ridge mountain area of North Carolina and I stopped at a rest station in Virginia.  This gas stop was advertised as the last one before the state line.  So I filled up and went it to pay for my gas when I had the following conversation:

“I’m looking at the map here and it looks like the state line is about an hour and a half or possibly two hours away.  Is that about right?”, I asked of the attendant.

With what can be described as ‘deer in headlights’ the lady behind the counter stared at me and with a stereotypical southern drawl responded “Oh, I don’t know.  I don’t get out a lot”

To say I was flabbergasted would be putting it mildly.  “Shouldn’t information like this be part of your training orientation?  Being the last gas station and all?”

I was met with a look that told me I had reached the intellectual capacity of this poor soul and just left my money on the counter and walked away.

  

Barbie and The Reservation

As I have mentioned in previous blog postings Barbie and I ride the GO train into Toronto for our jobs.  When you ride with the same people day in and day out for 5 years, in my case and 3 years in Barbie’s case, you get to develop what is referred to as ‘train friends’.  Our case is a little different as we have evolved our friendships with our ‘train friends’ into just regular friends.  We have meals with them, invite them to social gatherings, have celebrated retirements, weddings and child births as well as mourned deaths. To sum it up, we just keep in touch with each other on a basis much more than just commuters sharing a ride into the city.

So last night was one of our ‘GO train gatherings’ as we had dinner at Kelsey’s in Brampton – which by the way the service is horrid.  We will have to seriously look at a new dinner venue.  So taking the train home last night there were four of us sitting together having a good old chat.  During this chat the familiar tones of the theme from The Twilight Zone could be heard as Rod Serling voice overlayed his monologue that began each show.  Yes it was time for our loving Barbie to exit from reality have a ‘moment’.

“Did you make a reservation?”, she asked of me.  And since we had 12 people coming it was a valid question but I was in a smart arse mood.

“Do I look Native American to you?”, I replied sarcastically.

Instantly the other two ladies with us started snickering.  It became obvious that a joke had occurred and that poor Barbie missed it.  With a look of confusion she said,
“I don’t get it.”

“Ok”, I said.  “Where do natives live?”
I was fully expecting at this point the conversation would end as Barbie would then clue into my reservation reference.  Especially since she garnered that look of confidence she gets whenever she has the impression that she knows the answer 100%.

“In a tepee” she adamantly exclaims.

“Oh, Jesus Christ”, I muttered.  “Ok, and where is the tepee located.”
This time I was really sure she would get the answer required.

With great certainty, but not the overbearing confidence she had with answer one, she answered,
“In Wawa”

Fighting the urge to slap my forehead like one of the Three Stooges I gathered the patience for one more hinting question.
“And that big piece of land in Wawa is called what?”, I asked while making hand gestures to show obvious acreage of land.

She looked as us a little befuddled and answered, really unsure of herself, “A reserve?!?!?”

“A reservation.  Get it now?”

“Yes”, she said with annoyance.  “But I don’t think it’s really all that funny you know.  I’ve actually seen them living in tepees in Wawa so I really wasn’t wrong”, she proclaimed with great defiance at our humour.

  

Holiday Befuddlements Part Two

Well, the second installment of holiday guffaws starring none other than my son…again!  He apparently doesn’t do holidays so well.

So about a year and a half ago on Easter Sunday my son made his way downstairs when awoke and plopped himself on the couch.  In walking down the stairs from his room he must have passed at least 3 small chocolate Easter Eggs that were left by the Easter Bunny, and he hadn’t noticed.  However, he did remember there were hockey games on the night before and he flipped on one of the sports channels to see the highlights and scores.

As he was sitting there I turned to him and said “Hey, what day is today?”

“Sunday”

“What Sunday?”

“Um, Easter Sunday?”, he answered with a little uncertainty.

“And what happens on Easter Sunday?”

“We go to Granny’s for dinner?”, again with some uncertainty.

“Yes, but what else happens on Easter Sunday?”

He sat there for a little while and pondered the question for a while and then answered, with great confidence, “I know.  Jesus rose from the dead”

Now, I couldn’t fault him in this answer because he was technically right.  So I said “Yes that bit is also right.  However, that’s not what I was getting at.  Who comes on Easter Sunday?”

I would be lying if I said he answered right away, but to be honest it took the better part of a minute before he muttered to me “The Easter Bunny comes on Easter”

“Yes the Easter Bunny comes and does what?”

At that moment another synapse connected and he exclaimed “Oh man, I have chocolate eggs to find”

And he ran off on his little hunt while I sat there wondering once again how my offspring mind works.

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