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Posts tagged ‘gifts’

Barbie has a Cat Burglar

So the other day Barbie was separating her Christmas gifts into the piles of whom they would be going to.  Basically she had piles for the various family members as well as for the pets.  Barbie had taken one of those piles down to the living room, which she had staged as the wrapping station.  Suddenly she hears this thud upstairs which was followed by a set of little thuds.  As she “arose to hear such a clatter”, after all we need some Christmas theme here, Barbie noticed that her cat Dexter had dug out the toy hedgehog that was to be his Christmas gift.  The hedgehog was still attached to its cardboard packaging and he was tossing it down the stairs and chasing it.  So, as the saying goes, curiosity killed the cat or in this case killed his surprise Christmas gift.  So the lesson learnt is not only do people need to hide their gifts from their children but also from their dogs and cats it seems.

christmas gifts cat burglar hedgehog

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Barbie and her latest Freudian Slip

While sitting around wrapping Christmas gifts this evening Barbie and I had the old Christmas classic by Rankin and Bass Santa Claus Is Coming To Town.  As we were going through the gifts she held up a drinking glass emblazoned with pictures of Justin Bieber.  Just to be clear she bought this cup for her 6-year-old cousin.

“I can’t wait to give this to my little cousin”, Barbie exclaimed.  “She’ll be so excited to be drinking a cup of Beaver…f*ck, I mean Bieber.”

After about ten seconds of letting it sink in, mixed with my laughter, Barbie muttered “Why does this always happen to me?”

 

I can only assume it happens for the amusement of us all.

  

Holiday Befuddlements Part One

Well Happy Thanksgiving to my Canadian readers.  Being a family holiday I figured I’d share a story of holiday confusion that is well suited to this blog and the stories on it.  Unfortunately, this isn’t a story of our friend Barbie but rather about my 12-year-old son.  These stories took place when he was 10 but are funny none the less.

Story number one takes place at Christmas and as my son was making his way down to the bounty left by Santa.  The entertainment centre was wrapped in Christmas wrapping to hide the new Nintendo Wii that was hooked up to the television by Santa himself.  As the young lad entered into the room I said to him, “Right, start with any gift you want”

He looked around the room with that scanning radar that all young kids have when it comes to gifts and then went straight to his stocking.  I let this go since, by tradition, we had always started with stocking in our house.  Once the stocking was done, and probably some mental maths on when he’d eat what chocolates he got, he began the scan of the room again.

Now, knowing myself as a child, I expected the biggest gift with his name on it to be the one that he made a beeline to and started ripping open like a frenzied shark.  So the biggest gift in the room was quite simply the wrapped up entertainment unit.  However, he went to the tree and pulled one of the smaller packages.  To say I was confused would be an understatement.  So he opens this one and then goes off to the tree again and selects another one.  At this point I’m looking around the room for either a hidden camera in case the show Candid Camera was making a re-appearance or for the sight of Rod Serling in case my house was being used for an episode of Twilight Zone.

By gift number three I looked at my son and with a tone of confusion “Don’t you want to open the big gift right here” and I pointed at the entertainment centre.  With the eyes gazing widely, he made his way to the entertainment centre and ripped open the paper around it.

To set the scene here, there was a Wii wired up to the television and sitting beside it.  On top of the television was the remote controllers.  So here’s what ensued after the paper was shredded off the unit:

“Oh sweet!!!”

I figured Santa had hit the golden egg for gifts for my son that year…and then it was followed with:

“Santa gave me a Wii remote that I can take to Oma’s”

To say I was somewhat confused is an understatement.  How is it that he saw the remote and not the big white block beside the television?

So I mention “Um, what about the thing beside the TV?”

He takes a look and with big eyes exclaims “NICE!!!  Santa got us a Wii and he hooked it up already.  Man, he must really like us”

So to this day I haven’t figured out why my child went for the smaller gifts, or how after opening such a big gift he missed seeing the Wii beside the television and lastly how he thought that only a Wii remote would show up without the Wii but required an entire entertainment unit to be wrapped up.  If I ever sort this out I am asking for my Ph.D is psychology.

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