Hello everyone. It has been a very long time since I’ve put any story up and it most certainly isn’t because we haven’t had Barbie moments but more because in the pursuit of obtaining certification as a Project Manager I was taking two different night school courses, which are over (thank God).
So a few weeks back, probably around 8 weeks ago to be honest, I got an email from Barbie at my work because she was somewhat flustered. It seems that Barbie had ingested a brain eating amoeba…or so she thought.
Barbie, at the time, was suffering somewhat of a nasal condition and was using Hydrasense to flush out her sinuses to reduce infection. Enter the moment when Rod Serling does his Twlight Zone voice over and the familiar musically twang hits…yes we’ve hit “The Barbie Zone“.
It seems that Barbie had run out of Hydrasense, not surprising if you remember the Bukkake story, and decided on doing a homemade Neti Pot. So Barbie boiled some water, let it cool off and made a nasal rinse using some sea salt. After creating this concoction she performed her Charlie Sheen impersonation and performed a nasal rinse from it. So far so good. It was after this that all plans went to pot.
Barbie, with her ever vigilante internet medical searches, found this article which describe a brain eating amoeba found in tap water. Of course having read this article Barbie was convinced she had contracted it. However, after reading this article (which she read as well) remember the following:
- the deaths were in Louisiana
- less than 10 reported cases occur per year (in the US)
- the highest number of reported incidents were 8 in 1980
- the amoeba is a warm water friendly amoeba with very rare cases reported north of the Mason-Dixie Line
To make a long story short I received a rather panicked email from Barbie concerned because she had found out this information but, of course, after the nasal rinsing had taken place. No matter what was said I couldn’t settle Barbie down from the fact that she may have ‘snorted’ a brain eating amoeba. In fact it might have been easier to give a logical explanation as to how all the grass is freshly cut in “TheWalking Dead“ than have Barbie believe that she wasn’t in harm’s way from this homemade nasal rinse. So the count down began since the amoeba would kill a person in 7 days. Barbie went as far as emailing the town to find out the chlorination levels of water treatment because certain levels would kill the amoeba. She also asked her OBGYN about it and that didn’t go so well (only because the good doctor laughed at her).
So the longest week of my life then began. With each passing day I would hear about the countdown – “I might die in 6 days”. Of course I never believed it but someone did (nudge, nudge, wink, wink). So day after day went by and numbers slowly dropped with an anticipation I can only expect was matched by the original moon landing.
To say the least, nothing happened to Barbie. We are now working on about day 60+ after the nasal rinse but I will testify how bent out of shape Barbie was.