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Posts tagged ‘ken’

Male Barbie’s Can’t Work Loading Dock Doors

Yesterday when I was at work I bumped into a co-worker after making my lunch trip to Tim Horton’s for a cup of tea.  Fred, as we will call him, was coming off the elevator that goes from the loading dock to the basement where my machine shop is located.  Since most of my team was at a mandatory safety training seminar I was somewhat shocked to see Fred.

“Aren’t you doing the safety thing today?”

“No, I signed up for the next session coming up” he replied.  “Um, do you know if SPD (our shipping area) has keys to open the loading dock doors?”

“They might.  Why?”

“I can’t get it to open up.  The other door is open but is occupied with a delivery and the truck I’m trying to receive is in the other one.”

I was a little confused by all this since I have never seen the loading dock have the garage doors locked during day time hours.

“Really?  Let’s go see if I can fix you up”

So we got into the elevator and rode up to the loading docks.  As we walked over to the dock’s doors it was just as he described: one open and one closed.  We approached the closed-door and Fred went to open it up.

“See”, he said.  “It won’t open.”

I watched as Fred hit the button a few more times and I instantly knew his problem.  Fred had been hitting the wrong button.  Instead of hitting the Open button, which would raise the door up, he was hitting the Up button which lifts the tailgate so that you can unload skids from the trucks.  I quickly pointed this out to Fred and after sensing his embarrassment I said it would be our secret…until now haha.

1354221110185 TIM HORTONS INC. - Tim Hortons Raises a Cup to Canadian Coffee

Research Assistant Ken and the Solid Pipe

I was going to tell this story yesterday but since it was the 50th post I had to tell a Barbie related story, and since I’ve still got a few backlogged that I haven’t written I figured it was a good time to spill one out.  However, this story is about a co-worker of mine who is rather fond of the blog and laughs a lot at them when he hears them.  And now, due to a momentary lapse of synapse connection, he is going to be immortalized as a guest post.

My place of work is one of the premier research hospitals in North America, and the top one in Canada.  The tasks I have are to build prototypes of various devices, designed to assist patients and medical staff, that are tested and eventually put to market.  One of these projects that we were building involved a metal frame bent into shape with various diameter pipes.  One of the pipes wasn’t holding the form it was designed to hold so we figured we’d bend some new pipe with a thicker wall and better stability.

As we were trying to manually bend the pipe without crimping it, because our pipe bender is out of commission at the moment, my co-worker came out with a suggestion of such magnitude and brilliance that I heard angels sing from the heavens…or maybe just the extreme loudness of my laughter.

“Hey”, R.A. Ken says, “instead of using these pipes here wouldn’t the project be much stronger if we use a solid pipe?”

“If we use a what?”, I asked incredulously.

“A solid pipe.”

“A solid pipe?”, I asked again.

“Yeah a solid pipe.  That would make it way stronger and spring back wouldn’t it?” Ken asked.

“A solid effin’ pipe?”

“Yeah a solid…pipe…”, Ken repeated rather slowly as you could see the lights start to brighten inside his brain.  “Dammit, you know what I meant.  And you’re going to blog this aren’t you?”

“Oh yeah you know I will”, I said.  “A solid pipe hahahaha.”

I walked back to office laughing my head off and really wondering whether a university degree is actually a good thing.

  

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