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Engineering Barbie also needs facial recognition programming

Today at lunch I was sitting with two co-workers, one of which was Engineering Barbie and the other was Research Assistant Ken.  While we were eating lunch the following conversation came about:

“Do you know what song is stuck in my head?  That ‘Funky Mother’ song”.  This resulted in somewhat confused looks so Engineering Barbie elaborated.

“You know the one”, and she starts to hum a tune and then lowly sing the following, “…right about now, that funky mother, right about now”

At this point R.A. Ken and I started howling.   “That’s Fatboy Slim”, replied R.A. Ken in between spurts of laughter.  I added to the answer with the proper lyrics by saying, “You mean ‘Right about now, the funk soul brother’ don’t you?”

Immediately I opened up Youtube and found a video for the song.  “Yeah that’s the song.  Now imagine that being stuck in your head for the entire team meeting”, asked Engineering Barbie.

At this point I decided to try to stick another song in her head and said, “Well you could have this one instead.”
I clicked on the link for Snap! singing “I’ve Got The Power“.

Once this video started and the lead rapper, Turbo B, appeared poor Engineering Barbie fell into the ‘Barbie-Zone’ – which is kind of like the Twilight Zone but you see acts of goofiness instead of the weird.

“Oh my god, that’s the guy from Hot Tub something or other.”

At this moment there was a combined jaw drop as we turned to look at her.  R.A. Ken started killing himself laughing.  I, on the other hand, looked at Engineering Barbie and said “Um, no. Completely different dudes”.  Then to make matters a little more humorous, well at least for myself, I added “Not all black folks look-alike.”

Showing just how certain she was, Engineering Barbie started defending her case.  “No, look they have the same eyes”

“What?  Dark brown?  The majority of black people have eyes like that.”

A little frustrated now she pointed out Exhibit B, “Look they have the same nose”

“Yeah, most black people have that nose style.  In fact they even joke about it and call it a black nose.”

Engineering Barbie asked me to open a picture of Craig Robinson, and for the record she called him ‘the dude from the hot tub thingie movie’, so she could prove her case.  So I went to IMDB.com and found a picture of him.   So on one screen I had the music video and on the other screen I had a picture of Craig from the movie and it began.

“Look the nose is the same”, Engineering Barbie exclaimed.

“You mean except for the mole on the left side of the one guy’s nose right?”, I asked not so innocently.

“Oh, um, yeah.  Ok maybe they aren’t the same…or maybe he had it removed!”

“They aren’t the same.  Not all black people look-alike.  And these two dudes are certainly different, much like the other two you tend to confuse”, I added.

“Who else did she confuse?” asked R.A. Ken.

“Hulk Hogan and Mr. T, as they are apparently similar looking too.”

“WHAT?!?!?!?”, exclaimed R.A. Ken right before he turned beet red from laughing so hard.

Engineering Barbie chirped her two cents in with, “Well they are both really big muscular guys.”

“Yeah except Mr. T is like 5’4″ and black while Hogan, although tanned, is 6’7″ and white”, I mentioned.

“Whatever, the one looks like he should be called Mr. T anyways.  I’m going back to work”

And with that dear Engineering Barbie stomped off to her work station.



Engineering Ken and the hole issue…

As some of you know I work with a lot of engineers.  Many of them are supposed to be very smart individuals as they are pursuing their Master’s and Ph.D’s in their respective fields of studies.  However, these people can generate some of the best ‘Barbie Fail’ moments that even has Barbie herself shake her head in disbelief.

Yesterday I was eating lunch in my office with two co-workers when Engineering Ken, who just obtained his Master’s Degree, came skulking into the workshop with a rather embarrassed look about him.  He wandered into my office area and stopped at the doorway.

“Can I ask you something?”, he asked.

“Sure what do you need”, I replied.

“How can I get this off?”, he asked.  At that moment he raised his left hand up and sitting on his baby finger was a gear belt cog (actual item is in the photos).

I have to admit I wanted to laugh, and laugh hard.  However, I could see that he was really embarrassed by this so I bit my tongue…really, really, really hard.

“Here you can try this”, I said as I tossed him a small bottle of Vaseline I keep for greasing some parts up.  Engineering Ken looked perplexed at this and was wondering how he would fit his finger into the small jar deep enough to loosen the cog from his knuckle.  It seems, that despite knowing the algorithms for force and stress, our poor friend couldn’t muster the idea of using his other hand to take some of the petroleum jelly and apply it to his knuckle.

Seeing this struggle with the concept of how to apply Vaseline I offered him another solution.  “Or you can go spray some WD-40 on it”

So, like a mouse, he scurried off to find the WD-40.  About 20 seconds later he went walking, rather briskly, past the office.

“Did it work?”, I called out.

Without even looking back “Yes.  Thanks”

“Can I bring this up as events of interest at Thursday’s team meeting?”, I asked mildly joking (ok not really joking).

“Um, I would prefer you didn’t”.  At that moment he dropped his head and scurried out of the workshop with pace worthy of an Olympic track star.

I have to be honest, my two co-workers and I absolutely killed ourselves laughing when he left.


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