Holiday Befuddlements Part Two

Well, the second installment of holiday guffaws starring none other than my son…again!  He apparently doesn’t do holidays so well.

So about a year and a half ago on Easter Sunday my son made his way downstairs when awoke and plopped himself on the couch.  In walking down the stairs from his room he must have passed at least 3 small chocolate Easter Eggs that were left by the Easter Bunny, and he hadn’t noticed.  However, he did remember there were hockey games on the night before and he flipped on one of the sports channels to see the highlights and scores.

As he was sitting there I turned to him and said “Hey, what day is today?”

“Sunday”

“What Sunday?”

“Um, Easter Sunday?”, he answered with a little uncertainty.

“And what happens on Easter Sunday?”

“We go to Granny’s for dinner?”, again with some uncertainty.

“Yes, but what else happens on Easter Sunday?”

He sat there for a little while and pondered the question for a while and then answered, with great confidence, “I know.  Jesus rose from the dead”

Now, I couldn’t fault him in this answer because he was technically right.  So I said “Yes that bit is also right.  However, that’s not what I was getting at.  Who comes on Easter Sunday?”

I would be lying if I said he answered right away, but to be honest it took the better part of a minute before he muttered to me “The Easter Bunny comes on Easter”

“Yes the Easter Bunny comes and does what?”

At that moment another synapse connected and he exclaimed “Oh man, I have chocolate eggs to find”

And he ran off on his little hunt while I sat there wondering once again how my offspring mind works.

Holiday Befuddlements Part One

Well Happy Thanksgiving to my Canadian readers.  Being a family holiday I figured I’d share a story of holiday confusion that is well suited to this blog and the stories on it.  Unfortunately, this isn’t a story of our friend Barbie but rather about my 12-year-old son.  These stories took place when he was 10 but are funny none the less.

Story number one takes place at Christmas and as my son was making his way down to the bounty left by Santa.  The entertainment centre was wrapped in Christmas wrapping to hide the new Nintendo Wii that was hooked up to the television by Santa himself.  As the young lad entered into the room I said to him, “Right, start with any gift you want”

He looked around the room with that scanning radar that all young kids have when it comes to gifts and then went straight to his stocking.  I let this go since, by tradition, we had always started with stocking in our house.  Once the stocking was done, and probably some mental maths on when he’d eat what chocolates he got, he began the scan of the room again.

Now, knowing myself as a child, I expected the biggest gift with his name on it to be the one that he made a beeline to and started ripping open like a frenzied shark.  So the biggest gift in the room was quite simply the wrapped up entertainment unit.  However, he went to the tree and pulled one of the smaller packages.  To say I was confused would be an understatement.  So he opens this one and then goes off to the tree again and selects another one.  At this point I’m looking around the room for either a hidden camera in case the show Candid Camera was making a re-appearance or for the sight of Rod Serling in case my house was being used for an episode of Twilight Zone.

By gift number three I looked at my son and with a tone of confusion “Don’t you want to open the big gift right here” and I pointed at the entertainment centre.  With the eyes gazing widely, he made his way to the entertainment centre and ripped open the paper around it.

To set the scene here, there was a Wii wired up to the television and sitting beside it.  On top of the television was the remote controllers.  So here’s what ensued after the paper was shredded off the unit:

“Oh sweet!!!”

I figured Santa had hit the golden egg for gifts for my son that year…and then it was followed with:

“Santa gave me a Wii remote that I can take to Oma’s”

To say I was somewhat confused is an understatement.  How is it that he saw the remote and not the big white block beside the television?

So I mention “Um, what about the thing beside the TV?”

He takes a look and with big eyes exclaims “NICE!!!  Santa got us a Wii and he hooked it up already.  Man, he must really like us”

So to this day I haven’t figured out why my child went for the smaller gifts, or how after opening such a big gift he missed seeing the Wii beside the television and lastly how he thought that only a Wii remote would show up without the Wii but required an entire entertainment unit to be wrapped up.  If I ever sort this out I am asking for my Ph.D is psychology.